On any given night, thousands of undergraduates sit in dorm rooms surrounded by people yet feel profoundly alone. Research shows that loneliness among emerging adults is at an all-time high, and universities are not immune.

Jeffrey Arnett first described the emerging adult population in the May 2000 edition of The American Psychologist. He originally outlined the age range as 10-25; it has since been revised to 18-29. The proposal of this life phase was in response to the evolving nature of identity exploration and the broad expansion of higher education as a cultural norm. Today, emerging adults comprise a significant portion of the population on college campuses.

But why are they lonely in dorm rooms?

The answer is not simple; in fact, we could make lists about their social media use, unwillingness to make phone calls, or some sort of intergenerational dig. Indeed, the data is consistent; as our college campuses grow larger, it becomes increasingly difficult for our students to develop a sense of belonging.

Presently, large universities are working diligently to develop student engagement and support programs focused on concepts such as retention, engagement, and proactive/reactive intervention; however, something is still missing. The student population has been vocal in their need: better relationships with faculty.

Students often say a professor’s perceived care or connection helps them feel they matter. This perception of faculty support fosters a sense of belonging, motivation, and academic commitment.

The collective groan is palpable. Don’t faculty have enough to do? Yes, absolutely, they do. The good news is that the ask is not a big one. Relational conversations and holistic student development can occur in both the classroom and through macro communication.

Faculty can provide personal narratives as part of their lecture material. When faculty share parts of their own stories or identities (within professional bounds), it can humanize them and give students relational footholds. Some work in STEM and physics contexts explores this. Faculty who share their own reasons for being ardent about their subject often inspire students to locate personal meaning as well.

Meaning also fosters motivation and persistence. When students see a clear link between course material and their life goals, values, or future roles, they engage more deeply and perform better. This is often described as purpose-driven learning or meaning-making pedagogy. Take the humble discussion board, for example. When students share their thoughts online, they’re not just checking a box for participation points; they’re learning to translate ideas into written communication, to clarify complex thoughts, and to respond thoughtfully to others. It takes less than a minute to describe the meaning of that assignment, and it serves as a reminder of the skills our students are building.

Circling back to Jeffrey Jensen Arnette’s emerging adults, while he describes them as experiencing their existence as “in-between’ he also consistently describes them as the age group of possibilities and optimism. Two traits that a person of value in their life can help foster to carry over to their next life phase.

At a time when undergraduates are still shaping their identities and testing their values, the most valuable presence we can offer is not certainty, but relationship, the steady reminder that who they are becoming is seen and supported.

We become people of high regard to emerging adults not by defining their values for them, but by walking with them as they discover their own